"Touch my lab book one more time Marcus and I’mma slap the black out you."
"Yo how come we can watch a movie with animals havin’ sex but we can’t watch no movies with people havin’ sex? That’s some discrimination right there."
"Latisha can’t figure out what color hair her baby gonna get ‘cause babies ain’t born with weaves."
#blast my junk
Last week I explained the purpose of having a UV light in the goggle cabinet (and how UV light sterilizes things) and stressed to the students the importance of never opening the door while the light was is use.
Today I walked into the lab room after lunch and found one of my students standing on the counter in front of the cabinet, the door ajar and his crotch pressed up against the opening so hard his feet were slipping. His head was turned almost all the way around backwards (like an owl) and his eyes were squeezed shut as tight as eyes can possibly squeezed. I guess he was too busy worrying about his eyesight and didn’t hear the door because he was startled when I asked him what he was doing (and to please get down from there!).
“Oh, my bad Mr. P. I just don’t like rubbers is all.”
“What?” I asked, confused.
“I thought you said this goggle thang makes you sterile, and I was hopin’ I wouldn’t have to get no more rubbers if I blasted my junk.”
"Mr. P, how come we gotta cut up a frog anyways? We never see no frogs. How come we can’t cut up something we see every day, like a cat? Or a crackhead?"
"Embryos? Marcus gots lots of them. Ask Demetria. He gave her two embryos already. What they is when they not embryos anymore? Babies? Yeah he gave her two of those, too."